Parents make the best therapists

In the early 2000s, as a youth and family therapist at an outpatient addiction center in Vancouver, BC, I encountered a recurring pattern: disinterested teenagers, mandated by schools or pressured by parents, reluctantly attending therapy sessions. Despite our best efforts with evidence-based CBT, progress seemed stagnant.

Everything changed when I discovered Dr. David Freeman's "Multigenerational Family Therapy." Instead of focusing solely on the teenagers, Freeman advocated working with their parents. Skeptical at first, and hiding this approach from my supervisors, I gave it a try… the results were remarkable. By only working with the parents, I saw a gradual decline in their children's substance use.

Interestingly, years later, some parents from those families would reach out to share updates on their children's progress. They'd express gratitude, saying, "Thank you for working with my child and helping them through a challenging time." It's always been a dilemma for me, as I've never had the heart to correct them—I rarely worked directly with their child.

Postcard graphic and quote powered by Readwise.

Previous
Previous

You’re not ready for marriage

Next
Next

Intuit your principles