Feelings Schmielings: How to See Things As They Really Are

Often, my clients get stuck because they confuse feelings and facts. In tense situations, they tend to rely heavily on feelings, which leads to mind reading: “In my gut, I know that my spouse did this thing that hurt me because…” This often results in reacting to assumptions rather than reality, creating a lot of unnecessary problems. Without a proper roadmap for how relationships operate, we end up doing the same thing over and over again (cue the Albert Einstein line about insanity). Family Systems Theory provides a way of accurately and factually seeing how we, and our loved ones, operate. And when you learn to respond to what is actually happening, rather than what you wish it would be, you tend to live a much more meaningful life.

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